2012 to be continued . . .

Anahata chakra symbolizes the consciousness of...

Anahata chakra symbolizes the consciousness of love, empathy, selflessness and devotion.(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Like most everyone I always look forward to the New Year.  It is a time where we can wipe the proverbial slate clean and have another 365 days to get life right.  Facing new challenges that test our fortitude, embracing change or rejecting change based on new fears or ones of the old, choosing inevitably whether we will be the directors, dictating how this next chapter begins and ends or will we  just be the actor, taking direction of our life from someone or something that will, in the end be nothing but a production of our life based on their own self-interest or gain. giving up on our creative control despite our creative differences.

This year was supposed to have been much different than last.  A year where my life seen major changes and tested my strength like no other.  It left me exhausted and hopeless, giving up the production of my life for 365 days, becoming a mere actor in the production of my life, losing myself and what and who I was seemed like a life learning lesson and one that once I came to understand what was happening, learn from it and correct it I would never have to face that test again, as this year as proven so far I still have much to learn.

It seems like my altruistic ways leave me vulnerable and that doing for myself and doing for me is selfish and unattractive.  Why when others do for themselves their motives and/or reasoning for doing  is never questioned but when doing for myself it becomes a selfish act, inconsiderate of other. Why do some of us have to go through with life having to deal with a different set of standards and expectations?

I believe there are some I have allowed into my life who appreciate and respect my unselfish acts.  There are some who have come to expect my altruistic ways, taking advantage of my generosity and it is only when I step back do I take notice of what I have allowed to happen.  The circle of friends I keep, the ones I can depend on in a moment’s notice have always admired my inner strength and remind me of the personal challenges I have been able to overcome but why do I not see what they see?  I’m I blinded by my own humility?  Are we supposed to recognize the strength that others see in us?  Is it possible that someone can be too altruistic? Where some consider that a strength others see as a weakness.

Have I become a bystander in the production of my life?  How can I be giving and unselfish to some and self-centered and ego-maniacal to others? Have I become to naive to human nature that I am unable to recognize emotional manipulation?   When your empathy and altruistic nature is used against you for their own personal gain or self-satisfaction, am I at fault?  

I do not want to be someone who goes through the rest of my life jaded and I won’t if I become the producer of my own life.  I need to surround myself with those who embrace all the good in me, recognize that we all have flaws and take the good with the bad.  I am no means a perfect person but never will I manipulate emotionally for my own personal gain.  Allowing someone to manipulate a positive trait and turning it into something ugly but advantageous for them shows me my weakness, 

Perhaps it’s a lesson that I have yet to learn and why 2012 should have ended with, To be continued and not Happy New Year.

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You Don’t Say?

Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
When in doubt, just take the next small step.
 Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
 Pay off your credit cards every month.
 You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
 Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
  It’s okay to get angry with God. He can take it.
  Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
  When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
  Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
  It’s okay to let your children see you cry.
  Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
  If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
  Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.
  Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
  You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
  A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
  It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
  When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
  Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
  Over-prepare, then go with the flow.
  Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
 The most important sex organ is the brain.
  No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
 Frame every so-called disaster with these words: “In five years, will this matter?”
 Always choose life.
  Forgive everyone everything.
  What other people think of you is none of your business.
  Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
  However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
  Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
 Believe in miracles.
  God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
  Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
  Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
  Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
 Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.
 Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
 If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.
  Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
  Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
  All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
 Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
  The best is yet to come.
  No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
 Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
  If you don’t ask, you don’t get.
  Yield.
  Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.
Aside

Don’t………

 

Wait for time. Make it.

Wait for love. Feel it.

Wait for money. Earn it.

Wait for the path. Find it.

Wait for the Opportunity. Create it.

Don’t go for less. Get the best.

Compare. Be Unique.

Fight your misfortune. Transform it.

Avoid failure. Use it.

Dwell on a mistake. Learn from it.

Back down. Go around.

Close your eyes. Open your mind.

Run from life. Embrace it. 

Time for Wordpower

 The most selfish 1 letter word — I — AVOID IT.

The most satisfying 2 letter word– WE — USE IT.

The most poisonous 3 letter word — EGO — KILL IT.

The most used 4 letter word — LOVE — VALUE IT.

The most pleasing 5 letter word — SMILE — KEEP IT.

The fastest spreading 6 letter word – – RUMOUR – – IGNORE IT.

The hardest working 7 letter word — SUCCESS – – ACHIEVE IT.

The most enviable 8 letter word – – JEALOUSY – – DISTANCE IT.

The most powerful 9 letter word – – KNOWLEDGE – – ACQUIRE IT.

The most essential 10 letter word – – CONFIDENCE – – TRUST IT.